Mar 15 2011

I was at the grocery store last week without my children.

Did you know the grocery store is practically serene without someone touching you every two seconds and asking you to buy stuff?

On the downside, without my children, I found I could actually hear the light rock they pumped into the store.

And apparently, I’m very susceptible to picking up catchy tunes.

Sadly, “catchy tunes” includes a) The Never Ending Story, and b) You Sexy Thing.

I spent the first half of my grocery store visit singing “the never end-ding sto-oh-ree… ah ah ah, ah ah ah, ah ah aaaahhh… the never end-ding sto-oh-ree…”

Once audibly.

That I was aware of.

Fortunately, the broccoli area of produce was lightly populated at the time, soI may have gotten away with it.

Unfortunately, I’ve clearly spent too much time in church.

Instead of:

I believe in miracles.
Where you from?
You sexy thing.

I sing:

I believe in miracles.
Praise the Lord!
You sexy thing.


Is it the word “miracles” that sets me off?  Do I somehow intrinsically believe that the only thing that appropriately follows “miracles” is “praise the Lord?”

And what part of my subconscious is OK with “praise the Lord” being followed by “you sexy thang?”

What is wrong with me?

That is not a rhetorical question, so feel free to answer.