Here Come My Kids (and they gonna be sick)

It’s cold and flu season, friends. You might’ve heard it’s here. And unlike basketball season and football season, there’s no deadline for sign-ups and it’s never too late to join the team.

If you’re a parent with kids participating this year — or kids playing as starters and headed to state finals, baby! — then this recording is for you. Or, rather, for your friends, to help them understand they need to run. Like, NOW.

Hit play, plague-fighting parents. And enjoy! (Lyrics below, as well.)

[audio Here Comes My Kids ]

Here Come My Kids (and they gonna be sick)
by Nate Macy

Here come my kids and they gonna sick.
I don’t mean ill like “cool.” I mean, “Run away quick.”
They contagious. Contamined. Plague-spreading thugs.
Don’t even think about giving them a hug.

‘Cause they give you the sick. Make you puke through your nose
From which you can’t breathe ever again, you suppose.
Runnin’ to Uncle John, usin’ both ends.
So hear me now, and tell all your friends.

Here come my kids like a small pox blanket.
They rip out your immune system. And spank it.
The doctors in town all pay me a commission.
So hear me now. Assume the position.

My kids are walking pestilence, the fourteenth plague.
They just might go rabid and start chewing on your leg.
So hear my rhyme, so funky and so slick.
Here comes my kids and they gonna be sick.

………

P.S. Nate Macy made this recording just for us. Thanks, Nate! You’re rad.

………

P.P.S. How’s flu season going, folks? (Heh heh.)

……….

P.P.P.S. That “heh heh” was not mockery or laughter at your pain. It was a chuckle of mamaraderie, ’cause I’ve been there.

……….

Next Post
Previous Post

ABOUT BETH WOOLSEY I'm a writer. And a mess. And mouthy, brave, and strong. I believe we all belong to each other. I believe in the long way 'round. And I believe, always, in grace in the grime and wonder in the wild of a life lived off course from what was, once, a perfectly good plan.
12 comments
  1. Sending all y’all very healthy thoughts! (Which are not enough, but I’m hoping the thoughts still count.)

  2. I work in a day care. We have had the tissues in our hands for months now and then the thermometers have been constantly in our hands for the last few weeks because of course by the time you realize one kid is sick he’s passing it on to the other one, especially in the baby and toddler rooms. There’s only so much sanitizing you can do without quarantining all of the kids in little pack and plays with their own sets of toys but far enough from each other that they can’t throw their toys into another play pen or stand up and touch their germ-infested hands to eachothers. And that’s just not plausible or fun and the colds and flu going around this season have got to be better than that! And then the kids stay home a day or two and then come back only to have to go home again because apparently they haven’t quite gotten it out of their system. Oh ,and the parents get it and the teachers get it and the teacher’s kids get it, thus making that teacher stay home and then the other teachers work more hours to make up for it and then of course their immune systems are lowered because they are tired and have spent more and more hours in the room with the germies.

    Ok, now that I’ve made daycare sound like this horrible gross germ-ridden place, I promise that normally it’s not, and the siblings pass it to each other too, or they would get it in other places. Plus, the positive side is that these kids are really just building up a healthy immune system so that when they grow up their bodies are better able to fight off all the germies (yes, germies, I work with little kids. I’ve also said glovies many times to my roommates and other adults thanks to saying it around the kids so much! It’s like telling your college professor or boss, assuming you work somewhere other than a day care, that you have to go potty.)

  3. Last February we had the joy of all 5 of us getting the stomach flu at the same time. We were lucky enough to have it AGAIN this February! Only it was the regular flu. And instead of 24 hours it was TWO weeks. I never thought I would bathe or leave the house again. 🙁

  4. Ugh!!! We got hit hard this past weekend. With twins you can almost guarantee that when one gets sick, the other is bound to get sick too. Nothing like living in a foreign country, not knowing the language, and debating taking your 11 month olds to the ER at 2am because your kiddos have thrown up non stop since 11pm.

  5. We’ve been doing so well and I have beaten into their brains (not literally) handwashing. Constant handwashing. Don’t touch your face! Don’t touch the baby’s face! I have even been washing the baby’s hands regularly. Then he got too big for his carrier, which means he got big enough to sit in store carriages. Still, I wiped them down first, anything his little hands could reach. Today, I turned my back (hand on him because he’s suicidal, I think. He tries to jump off of high things). When I turned back he was sucking on the back of the seat he was sitting in. I can’t imagine the bird poop and sneezes and God knows what that seat has seen. So now, we wait.

  6. Beth, thank you for sharing this! Loved it! First, all my kids took turns being sick, puke and no, and I was so sad that I said “aww I’d sick myself, than to watch my babies be sick. ” Wish granted. I spent a week with the most miserable chest cold in conscious memory. I was lucky to have been able to spend two days mostly in bed, and armed with DayQuil and Ester C, I was able to become functional again. And miraculously, none of my four kids got it. So you can walk your normal pace if you see them. Although you NEVER know what they catch at school THIS WEEK …

    1. Wishing you all well, Yelena (since wishes work ;)).

  7. We’ve all been sick pretty much since Christmas. It’ll go away for a few days and I think we’ve beaten it but I’m sadly mistaken. Right now my right nostril is completely plugged and my youngest has crusties around her nose and a hacking cough.

  8. So far, we are holding the fort. However, boy child was a tad sniffly this morning. No fever. We will not give in!

  9. Hey! They’re all healthy! We’ll be saving up for when you get home!

  10. I so needed this. We welcomed foster baby 12/7. 12/8 my nose started running, followed by the other 5 of us, including the baby. Fortunately it was a short lived, three day runny nose, no big deal. Then we ended up in the hospital with baby 1/14 for two days, followed by two weeks of baby and bio son hacking like crazy. Last Friday I had a fever, which my hubby had Monday, but his included a runny nose which I came down with on Tuesday. So far this illness is confined to the parents, but I’m holding my breath as much as possible to keep the kids from getting it. Is winter over yet?

    1. Oh, man! I hope everyone’s well now.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *