Let’s Play Good News / Bad News
Nov 9 2014
I’ll go first, starting with last Wednesday’s Good News / Bad News and then updating you to the present.
Here we go!
Good News: We did not have to take a kid to the hospital tonight.
Bad News: The kid may have a cracked jaw.
Good News: He can eat!
Bad News: But not solids.
Good News: We have access to effective over-the-counter pain medicine in this country.
Bad News: He couldn’t swallow it.
Good News: And then he did!
Bad News: His sister did this to him with a pool noodle, her shoulder and some mad ninja spinning skillz.
Good News: She says it wasn’t on purpose.
Bad News: All the witnesses disagree with her.
Good News: Someone bit her at Youth Group tonight. HARD. There are tooth marks and a bruise.
(Maybe that was Bad News. I’m getting confused.)
Bad News: It was her brother who bit her.
Good News: Not the same brother whose jaw might be cracked. He could’ve re-injured himself.
Bad News: I gotta figure out what to do with the Pool Noodle Ninja AND the Biter. Sheesh.
Good News: It’s bedtime, so I’m doing NOTHING ’til tomorrow.
That was Good News / Bad News from Wednesday.
Now that it’s Sunday, I have follow-up Good News / Bad News.
Good News: The kid’s jaw wasn’t cracked, and he could totally eat solids 2 days later.
Bad News: The Pool Noodle Ninja and the Biter had to suffer unreasonable consequences like Doing Nice Things for the Siblings They’d Wounded. For a WHOLE DAY. Which was TORTURE.
Good News: The human spirit is resilient and everyone bounced back.
Bad News: That kid whose jaw wasn’t cracked? The 8-year-old, 60-pounder of a kid? Got bit in the leg by a dog this weekend. BIT. By a dog. A big dog. With a big, huge mouth. Like, puncture wound kind of bit, not like scratched-and-scared kind of bit. BIT bit.
Good News: The human spirit is resilient and everyone bounced back. Again. Even this mommy who has her own teeny, tiny history with dog bites… and who, you know, has a nose made partially out of ear, some pretty darn good facial scarring (if I do say so myself), and a nice number of reconstructive and plastic surgeries to my credit thanks to my own childhood run-in with a dog. Still – we are resilient, man! We will overcome!
Bad News: The kid’s playdate at the friend’s house – the one with the dog – was shorter than he’d hoped what with all the wound-cleaning and couch-sitting and doctor-calling and mommy-rocking-her-baby-boy that had to be done. Mostly for the mommy’s sake, but whatever.
Good News: They still got to play together because, “NO, I do NOT want to go home, Mom. They put that dog in the backyard, you know, and we still have to play Minecraft ’cause they have mods. Doy.”
Bad News: My kid’s mom has all the wrong priorities – Minecraft FIRST; freaking out over dog bites SECOND. Stupid moms.
Good News: The other kid’s mom had a really, really good selection of calming teas, which, let’s be honest, we both needed. And my kid’s mom has a bathtub and beer, both of which she used liberally this weekend.
So PHEW! You know? Phew. We survived the weekend, and I am not even exaggerating this time. We lived through it, and PHEW!
And now it is YOUR TURN to play Good News / Bad News. Please do share. It’s always more fun when we play together.
Here are a couple examples from our Facebook sharing, just to inspire you…
Good News: I was able to get into my car tonight at work.
Bad News: I only was able to do that after calling my husband and yelling at him because the battery and my emergency key wouldn’t work on the car.
Good News: It was the wrong car I was trying to get into with my keys.
Bad News: I’m getting so old and forgetful I spent 10 minutes using my keys on someone else’s car.
Good News: I wasn’t arrested for attempted car theft.
Good News: The lake is frozen thick enough we can skate on it!
Bad News: My 4th grader took a hockey stick to the face and busted his lip and front tooth.
Good News: It was cold enough outside to at least keep the swelling down.
Bad News: All the blood froze where we skate. How to you get frozen blood off of a frozen lake?
Oh my gosh, you guys. I just love you all SO MUCH.
So what’ve you got, friends? Do tell…