Trophy Time: GOT DRESSED

Hey, BIG NEWS. I got dressed today. To my shoes. In Not Pajamas. With everything right side out. BEFORE NOON. I have thus been awarded the following trophy.

GOT DRESSED!

To be clear, by “I’ve been awarded,” I mean I awarded it to myself which is only appropriate as I’m the Governing Body that oversees Dressedness in my home. 

You may remember last month, when I accepted trophies in myriad categories including Smothered Zero People With a Pillow and Injury Free Workplace: 60 Minutes. Well, this trophy was available to me then (in a burst of unbridled optimism, I’d ordered it for myself from the Trophy Store), but the time never seemed right to bestow it, partly because I avoid getting dressed whenever possible, and partly because 1. Getting Dressed, 2. Remembering I’m Dressed, and 3. Taking a Photo to Prove I’m Dressed was two steps too many. My three steps looked more like 1. Getting Dressed, 2. Getting Undressed as Soon as Socially Feasible (i.e. upon walking one step in my front door), and then, 3. much later, going, “DAMN. I FORGOT MY TROPHY AGAIN.”

In other words, it’s been a long, hard road to the trophy podium, friends. I had to get dressed, like, a dozen times at least, practicing and persevering like all elite athletes. Sometimes, I awoke before dawn to dress, and sometimes I found myself still wearing clothes when the sun went down. There were days of Clothes-Wearing that seemed endless, y’all, but I never — not once — took my clothes off during a school district meeting that ran late, or while having fancy dinner with my cousin when my waistband pinched, or in the grocery store parking lot even though the drive home would’ve been way more comfy without jeans.

I earned this award, in other words, so I’d like to take this opportunity to remind everyone to work hard and TRY. Success comes one pant leg at a time unless you’re smart enough to wear a skirt which takes way less effort. And, in the end, dreams DO come true. 

With love,

 

 

 

P.S. I ALMOST FORGOT PROOF. Jeez.

Special thanks to Greg who took this pic in which I’m DRESSED…

…thus reminding me to award myself this long overdue prize. Sure, I’m both dressed AND back in bed in that pic (because what’s a girl to do when her puppy and her kid want to snuggle?), but that just means I ALSO get the “Made the Bed: HA HA JUST KIDDING” trophy today. 

P.P.S. Did anyone notice this in the first pic?

Yeah, me, too. IDK what that is or how it got there, but, y’all, I just left it the hell alone because it looks dangerous. I feel like that’s a solid choice. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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ABOUT BETH WOOLSEY I'm a writer. And a mess. And mouthy, brave, and strong. I believe we all belong to each other. I believe in the long way 'round. And I believe, always, in grace in the grime and wonder in the wild of a life lived off course from what was, once, a perfectly good plan.
3 comments
  1. I think I need to order some trophies to give to my kids for doing these things.

    – Ready for school before mom lost her mind
    – Finished homework AND turned it in ON TIME
    – No one tripped over junk in my room

    These awards could be awarded on Saturday at dinner, because let’s face it… that’s the only day that I put any effort into a meal because – time/work/life = no motivation.

  2. A round of applause for meeting your goals and getting proof all while making sure you are soaking in all the snuggles a kid (and fur-baby) have to offer! Brava, Mama Woolsey! All while having a child per finger on your hand! That is a lot of babies! I have one for each day of the week — so where is this trophy site, cause I fed half of them yesterday! ;-D

  3. That one you’re in on the bed could be considered “yoga”. Just sayin! Another trophy Maybe?

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