Updated: Weekend Earring Giveaway

May 2, 2011 Update: Winners!

Yep, big surprise.  I couldn’t pick just one winner.  So I kept drawing ’til they’re all gone, and now I have to go back to LB Designs and buy some for myself.  Shoot!

Congratulations to the following winners, selected randomly:

  1. Monica: “#1 is calling to me. Gold AND pink? Check. Check.”
  2. Holly in Japan : “‘Well played, dog. Well played.’ soooo funny! Animals are smarter than we give them credit for, I think. He knows how to keep his bread buttered. ‘I do ship internationally. Because I can do whatever I want. Except teach a kid to behave well enough to keep from being suspended. Control what you can, right?’ oh Beth, you are seriously cracking me up. Story of my life! control what you can. Two more fave quotes!  Oh yes, I nearly forgot the earrings. Love them all – would wear the red ones the most, but I’m always up for a new wardrobe for any pair of earrings. (^_^)v”
  3. Heidi:  “Beth, You are a riot…R-I-O-T! You should know that Kim, your sis-in-law is one of your biggest fans…she got me hooked on you! That, and your baby shower throwing skills kind of sealed the deal for me. Darn pork n beans! ;) By the way…I’m not normally a dangly earring kind of gal, but I’m willing to try something new if I win. I’ll go with pair #2!! :)

Thanks, ladies!  And congrats on your wins!  Please email your address to fivekidsisalotofkids@gmail.com so I can get these shipped to ya. ...  read more

The Queen and I

It’s time to roll out my credentials to justify why, oh why, with all the crazy and irritating* coverage of the royal Windsor wedding, I, too, MUST cover something royal.

*And, by irritating, I mean AWESOME.

I do.

It’s true.

So if royal mania makes you want to gag, go ahead and skip this one.  I promise to be back to my more common shenanigans tomorrow. ...  read more

Our Cat Died

Aden is 9 years old.

Her elementary school principal has lovely handwriting.

I would know, because I get letters beautifully addressed “To the Parents of Aden.”

My pretty little angel follows all the school rules and behaves perfectly.  Whenever she feels like it.

All the rest of the time, her behavior’s in the crapper.

This month’s hand-written reports: ...  read more

Put Down The Urinal Cake

Greg won.

It was a year-long contest, if I remember correctly.

We had three kids, and we caught ourselves saying the most bizarre things.  Things we never expected to hear our own mouths speak.

Things like, “The dog is not a napkin.”

And, “Please don’t paint yourself with your popsicle.”

At some point, like oh-so-many parts of parenting, it moved from outrageously frustrating to epically entertaining. ...  read more


Cai was punky on Easter.  He was just having one of those off days with lots of tears.

There were tears in the morning because Cai’s plastic chicken wasn’t pooping enough bubble gum.

There were tears at church because Cai wanted to play Jesus in our preschool class resurrection story.

Yes, he cried even though I let everyone play Jesus.  All at once.  Which made for 5 Jesuses (girls and boys, of course) lying together, dead in the tomb, before the 3 angels rolled the yoga ball away. ...  read more

How to Name a Baby Mulligan

There’s a part of me that fears that no one will come to my parties ever again.

Then there’s the part of me that keeps making up new baby shower games.

The second part says to the first part, “Screw you, sucka!  I don’t care if you make new friends.  I just wanna laugh at others’ pain.”

I usually listen to the second part because she’s more fun.  She also gets me in trouble a lot.  To which I say, “Eh.” ...  read more

Happy Easter

Just a quick message from my pooping chickens to yours.

Here’s wishing you and yours joy and peace.

Or, if your house is like mine, and peace is right out, then…

Here’s wishing you and yours joy; and, if you lose your head, may someone find and reattach it quickly.

Happy Easter!