I know sometimes it’s hard to know how to talk to our families. Since some of you may be a little newer at this family gig than we are, I thought I’d share a few family communication tips based on the conversations I had today with my sweet ones.
I was busy today doing all of my back-to-school shopping online.
Scratching my head. Opening All the Tabs. Trying to find deals so my kids will arrive back at school with luxuries like pencils and paper.
Of course, my kids leave me alone to do this because they’re polite. Helpful. Respectful. And they know I’m working hard for them.
I might’ve had to yell down the stairs once or twice because they were fighting.
But they assured me they were just play fighting. Which, you know, always goes well when the 14-year-old football player is play fighting his 7-year-old brother.
So I reminded my 14-year-old, gently, of course, that THERE WAS A REASON I TOLD THEM TO STOP FIGHTING.
He took it well so we had a sweet follow-up chat, where I delivered profound, ancient mommy wisdom, and he thanked me for being so kind and wonderful.
On my way back to my computer, I noticed through an open doorway that the other 7-year-old wasn’t doing his chore as asked.
But he said he was. My bad.
Which is when my teenage daughter came to spend time with me, ask me what I think about life, how my day was, and what she might do to help out around the house. You know, the usual.
It was a special time.
Eventually, I wondered where my middlest child, whom I hadn’t seen for quite some time, might be.
I figured it out.
And I finally wrapped up all the school supplies shopping.
I shared my good news with Greg,
… who told me what a good job I did.
It’s OK, though. It is. I didn’t overreact or anything. I just walked right past him. And then maybe turned around and said one more, tiny thing.
In conclusion, I’m leaving my family.
Today is an I’m Moving Out Day.
Tomorrow may be an I’ll Never Let Them Go Day.
But TODAY is not tomorrow, and I’m leaving.
On a jet plane.
Or on a boat.
Or by scooter.
But this time, I’m not telling my family, ’cause last time I said I was moving to Mexico, my son just told me to bring him back a churro.
P.S. I just spent the afternoon in my room, coloring. That’ll teach ’em.
P.P.S. And how was your day?
21 responses to “What It’s Like to Communicate With Family”
I missed this post earlier in the week, and so I’m just now telling you what a delight it is. It is absolutely hilarious!
[…] except nearly all of that’s a lie because I’ve only done one of those things. I ordered school supplies online in an […]
I’m a little late chiming in, but your blog is a treat I give myself, just love your real life entries, this one especially so! My day started by finding out that my thoughtful, charming and respectful husband (eh-hmmm) has booked tickets for himself and our 3 children to go to Ireland for three weeks this summer, and did not include me! His reasoning, that he tried to talk to me about it yesterday, and I didn’t listen, so he did it without me. And that only 2 frequent flyer miles seats were available on 2 flights, so just four can go. Oh, was that the hurried questions you were trying to ask me as I was under the hairdryer and then running out the door, late for my 47 yr old friend’s funeral? When you called me an *ss*ole for not coming back inside to find the backscratcher for you and scratch your back? Seriously fed up with this unemployed man who tries to micromanage everyone, and does nothing. Ok, pity party over, and other than telling him that there is no way I will let him take my kids overseas without me, I am trying to let it go for now. (cue the Frozen song) Did I mention he has them booked on 2 different flights, five hours apart in arrival time, because that was the only to do it free with miles? So 2 of kids are supposed to sit in an airport, without a parent, for hours? Can anyone say, “nuts”? Grrrrr, at least I have nearly 10 months to figure this out. I beg prayers for this family, I am having a very hard time praying for such an unkind person who I share a home, kids, bed, food, cook and clean for….. ok, done for now. Keep the love coming, and the humor, it’s good to see how much your and your hubby love each other!
Loved this post. I remember those days, but I only had four kids. At one time they were 6, 4, 2, and newborn. And at another time, they were 18, 16, 14, and one 12-year-old who started being a teenager when he was 11.
Now they are 62, 60, 58, and 56. Time flies.
Do you live at my house? Because that sounds just like a day in my life!
My husband talks and I hear, “It’s all your fault.” I talk and my husband hears, “blahblahblahblahblah.” We are keeping those lines of communication open. I say, “son, please pick up your legos,” and he says, “Stop Yelling At Me!”
Excellent artwork! I loved it. Looks like the middlest child should’ve won the prize for the day. You’re a saint. I think at least one of the children (or more likely the husband) would’ve gotten the full wrath from me.
I have had every one of those conversations, and my children are only 2, 3, and 5. The teenage years are going to be fun. :p
This was a good version of my day. But instead of trying to buy school supplies (although some were purchased) I was trying to find accommodation and curriculum and audio versions of text books for my profoundly dyslexic daughter that will be starting 6th grade with a whole new IEP team at our charter school, and teacher with labels like “Special learning disorder” and “Processing Disorder” which tell me NOTHING about how to best teach and work with said differences.
I *DID* leave my family. I went down to a neighboring sympathetic mother (momradarie at it’s best) to do laundry there because (to add whip cream to my sunday) our washing machine has been non-funtioning. SO . . . I pack up my computer and “to-do’s” and head down there to spend HOURS “doing laundry” . . . hehe.
Precisely. You nailed it. Glad you got some relaxing time on the grass under the tree. (I love your blog.)
I spent the day trying to make my eleven year old try on his school uniform,he wouldn’t,reasoning that he won’t have to go to school if it doesn’t fit….
My nine year old daughter found one of those measuring tapes that springs back into itself,you know,the really loud ones….and measured everything in the house.Then I noticed that she is starting to grow a monobrow… and I allowed myself the luxury of fretting over this frivolity for two minutes.
Then we went to the shops but it started to rain so we drove home without shopping.I had nothing for my husbands dinner but being the excellent wife that I am I found a bag of risotto in the back of the freezer,I think that I bought it in 2004….I lovingly lobbed it onto a pan and burnt it,sorry,cooked it for him.He is playing tennis tonight because he needs to unwind….yeah….
Today….I’m looking at a house FULL of boxes and piles of stuff – moved over the weekend. Actually more piles of stuff than boxes of stuff. After a complaint to the movers that they tore up most of our furniture, and took hours and hours to do it, listened to them complain about the long walk down the hallway :0 I’m pretty sure our new place is haunted, since the baby now seems to be possessed. Started fall semester of school today. And instead of doing homework, or tackling the unpacking, I’m sitting here reading your post with a baby on my lap. 😀 I second the congratulations on finishing school supply shopping! – no small feat!!! And thanks for sharing your coloring – it made my day!!!
My son, who will be 2 on Friday, has been pooping a lot lately- maybe 3 or 4 times more than normal. Hr has his very first diaper rash, and it is terrible. So between him and his 2 1/2 month old baby sister, I haven’t gone a day without having someone poop through their clothes in over a week.So my days have been filled with laundry… Lots of laundry…
Those look like some good markers.
We went over to some friend’s house after church. And they are friends we love dearly but are still in the early development type stage of friendship with. Well, my nearly-two-year-old pooped in their yard and I vagina-bled onto their above ground pool. I think they still love us too though, even despite it…and we may just be full fledged best friends now.
Today was actually a pretty good day. This evening, however…We invited some friends over for dessert. One brought her 2 kids and 2 of their neighbor kids. This was a little more excitement than my kids could handle, and my son got aggressive, and it ended in a scuffle, to both moms’ mortification. He spiraled further from there into an “I hate school and I am so dumb and the teachers are going to be mean because they will think I should know this stuff by now…” (he’s been in this country for two years and struggles with literacy because, y’know, PTSD and focusing on remembering which letter makes which sound don’t go well together). I wound up holding him gently in my lap while he tried to kick me and I had to tell our remaining guest that it was probably time for him to leave (husband was dealing with daughter sobbing in her room because Mama wasn’t putting her to bed).
I kept my cool pretty well though, and he wound up volunteering the idea that he spent the first 8 years of his life in crappy situations so he has a lot to overcome, and when I told him (after lecturing him pointlessly on his behavior) “Even if you get into fights, and even if you get in trouble at school, and even if you hate school, we still love you,” his eyes filled up with tears. He went to bed easily after that, and I was able to snuggle with my daughter until she fell asleep. So other than my kid fighting with my friend’s kid and needing to be restrained as I sent another friend home, it was a good time.
My 2 year old is in bed with me since we just spent an hour in battle over him going to sleep in his bed. (I lost.) My husband is out having relaxing alone time. Today when I mentioned I think I should go to an upcoming women’s retreat because I haven’t had an overnight away from children in over 3 years, he laughed and thought I was exaggerating. He seriously didn’t think it was true and had no conscious knowledge that I do not get overnights away for business, conferences, etc. like he does. Ever. I want this day to be over. But until then….I think I will go watch the new Doctor after the last child falls asleep. At least there is that.
Jodie wins 😉 We came home from vacation Friday and I realized today that my two year old, except for diaper changes (mother of the year), hasn’t been dressed since. That would have been a great time to wash vacation laundry but I played the Sims instead. I only play it every few months because it sucks me in for HOURS until I realize I fed my fake baby way more than I fed my real one. Congrats on finishing back to school shopping! Sure was nice of your husband to volunteer to do it from now on in that special way husbands have.
I am the same way with the Sims,i had to give it up til my kids were old enough to fend for themselves.Now i have 4,5 & 11 but i still limit myself to after they are in bed.
We spent the day swimming in a lake that had a sign posted reading:
“CAUTION: IMPAIRED WATER QUALITY. POTENTIAL HEALTH RISK IF SWALLOWED”
Of course I didn’t notice it until AFTER we were done swimming and going home.
I’m trying not to think about how much my 3yo ingested.
Today started with skipping church because the youngest threw up in the car yesterday then spent the night with diarrhea. The oldest woke up with terrible stomach pain but after several hours of belching (12 year old girl!!) she felt much better. This afternoon my husband mowed the lawn and put a rock through the window. My oldest accidentally shut my youngest’s finger in the door and we debated getting it xray’d. After a popsicle and a text to my good nurse friend we decided to ice and just watch it. BUT I do have the kids in bed by 10. No wait… a door just opened, sigh.