Hi, I’m Beth. 

I’m a writer, a wanderer, and a welcomer.

Beyond that? It’s complicated.

Mostly, this blog is all about finding magic in the absolute mess of this authentic life. 

It’s about being real

It’s about shedding expectations of doing in favor of loving ourselves for being.

It’s about rest and respite.

It’s about community and how desperately we need each other.

It’s about the realities of seeking joy while living with chronic depression

And it’s about desperately loving our people exactly as they already are. 

{In other words, if you’re looking for a place that will MOTIVATE YOU TO ACHIEVE & BE PRODUCTIVE, you should run. Don’t look back. This is not that place.}

But if you’re looking for a place that’s a little rowdy, often sweary, definitely complicated, always weird, and unapologetic about being wild and free, welcome home

But who am I?

Well, the cold, hard facts are as follows:

  • I have five kids, mostly adults now. Six with the son-in-law. Some of my babies are adopted. Some are people of color. Some have disabilities. Some are neurodelicious. Some are queer (me, too). And all are wildly perfect. 
  • I’ve been happily married to Greg for 20 years, which is a tiny bit awkward because we’ve been married 29. Listen, it took us a while to figure out how not to be shitty to each other. We got there eventually.
  • My house is most often packed to the absolute brim with teenagers and young adults. They are messy and mouthy, and I adore them, so I lure them to me with snacks.
  • I live with joy and chronic depression. Both/And. 
  • I’m a recovering evangelical. An ex-vangelical, if you will. I still think Jesus is OK, but the Christian Machine in America is a big nope for me. 
  • I’m most internet-famous for pooping my closet
  • I live in Oregon wine country.
  • I can see llamas from my house.
  • I host retreats.
  • I foster kittens.
  • I read escapist novels
  • I travel the world with my sidekick, Anxiety.
  • I use my words. 

Speaking of My Words, Here Are Some:

The Day I Pooped My Closet
My Penis Is Not Okay

How to Wave in the Dark 
We Do Train Wrecks Here 
Holding Hands in the Dark

The Importance of Mud
On Rejecting Balance 

When Depression Is in Disguise
A Determined Walk to Slow Hope 
White Lights Lead to Red Lights 
The Ladder Up

20 Things Every Parent Should Hear
For New Moms
The Evolution of My Cape
On Working Tirefully
On Being a Mother and a Time Traveler 


115 responses to “”

  1. Hi Beth,
    I’ve been following you for years and always wanted to try your Easy-peasy Homemade Cinnamon Rolls. Today was the day and I’m kicking myself for waiting so long. They are easy! And delicious!
    But I had to write to tell you that in true Beth Woolsey style, mayhem ensued during the process! As I washed my hands from spreading the butter, I looked out at the back yard squirrels running everywhere. All of a sudden, one popped up in front of me inside the screened porch! While I didn’t need to get the Superman sticker out of the mixing bowl, I did need to chase a squirrel out of the porch and patch up the hole in the screen with cardboard and pink skull and crossbones duct tape from our craft supplies!
    Thanks for sharing your ideas, recipes, and life in general!

  2. I’ve stumbled across your blog from a Facebook post. You have a wonderful way with words, and I am enjoying your outlook on life (from the several posts I’ve read). Thank you for sharing. 🙂

  3. I am loving your blog! I think I fell in love with you because of your ‘pooped the closet’ story. I too am a mom living out loud, anonymously though. I guess that’s not too loud, is it?! I’m doing a podcast with my sister (mouse and weens) because I’m so tired of the perfect-perfect moms and social media out there. Let’s get real, people! Real is relatable. Real is funny. Real is real-life. So there. 🙂 Congratulations on your success and keep it up!

    • I loved reading your blog. I am suspecting that I may be prego with #5 at the age of 36. Maybe I’m in denial but and ha be been taking my time to get tested. I’m worried because a baby #5 was not planned

  4. Hey there! So how did I find your blog? By searching “how to get the stank out of a teenaged boy’s room” .
    Funny stuff here! After reading the comments( your readers also have quite the sense of humor) I bought a product someone recommended. I’ll keep you posted.
    Keep up the great entertaimment!
    Mom to 4
    Mother in law to 1
    Grandma to 1 and one baking 🙂

  5. Hey There,
    I’m so pleased I somehow came across your site. I’m blessed that my life partner – the mother of our 5 kids, all C-sections – is the most remarkable person I’ve known.
    We received all the mind-numbing comments (you have your own basketball team, etc) but that stuff only made us proud and confident.
    We are now both 65 and expecting our 7th grand-child with several more in our future, I’m sure.
    BTW, we have learned that a devoted couple never outgrows being parents and, usually, I’m terribly pleased by that reality.
    Rock On Large Families! Warm regards, Dave M

  6. I know how you feel and want to thank you for your article.
    If you choose, you can contact me by e-mail.

    Ricky Jackson,

    Former NOBTS Student
    Former Celebrate Recovery Ministry Leader
    Former K-Love Radio Ambassador

  7. Really like reading your blog. You stand out from all the other thousands of mom blogs out there because of your down-to-earth, funny and totally REAL tone. I have 6 kids myself (all singles, all biological) and it’s great to have somewhere to go where I feel like someone else GETS IT.

  8. Hi Beth! I just stumbled upon your site in the Facebook rabbit hole I fell down, and I’m glad I did! I have five kids, too – and I very much appreciate your unreasonable, ridiculous people stories. Thanks for sharing your life! 🙂

  9. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS BLOG! I just came across it and I feel so much better about being pregnant with my 5th baby! It’s a complete shock and still pretty surreal that I’m adding another baby to our family…Reading your blog made me feel a million times better, and I have the “I can do this attitude!” So thank you again, I can’t wait to keep reading!

  10. I’m so looking forward to spending this Thanksgiving with you and your wonderful family and swapping some great stories; I usually spend holidays with my cats and I’ve already heard all of their tales. It’s probably a good idea to save any feculent anecdotes for after dinner in order to avoid those unpredictable and awkward gag reflexes while chowing down on dead bird and trimmings (especially the cranberry sauce — a story for another time). I’m hoping that you don’t serve tofu turkey as my religion imposes some very strict restrictions on that type of nonsense. Can I bring anything? I specialize in ice, paper plates, plastic utensils etc.

  11. Just found your blog by reading I pooped in my closet and I loved you right away. 🙂

    We have 7 kids. I call them our 7 from Heaven but sometimes I wonder. LOL

    After having 2 children by birth We did foster care for 12 years and had 65 toddlers and babies. We adopted 5. We have 3 still at home and 4 grand kids.

    Life is so full of life that laughter and truth is a must.

    I found your blog so refreshing, I’m all in. 🙂

  12. We are a family of 6 (4 beautiful boys 6, 4, 2, and 9m) and love it so much we’ve decided to add one more blessing to our lives. It’s hectic but I’ve never had so much fun and I just consider everyday a party in our house. 🙂 I too never imagined having more than 2 but here we are…and it’s crazy and awesome at the same time!

  13. I just read your blog on school and couldn’t stop laughing. I too am a mom of 5 with two Houdini dogs. Life is hectic 90% of the time and my kids can be overbearing (everyone of them), funny, miserable all in a 5 minute span but I love this crazy wonderful life God has created for me. Looking forward to your future adventures!!!!!!!!!

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