Dog Breath

Totally gross post here.  Consider this fair warning.

……

I’ve heard of dog breath, but…

Today Cael asked me if all dogs’ penises smell bad.

Me: Why do you think dogs’ penises smell bad, Cael?

Cael: Our dog’s penis smells bad.

I don’t want to know.

I really, really don’t.

I think I’ll just go apologize to our dog, and we’ll move on. ...  read more

Monday

It started with the jam.

I tried to open it, but the lid was glued to the jar.  A rubberband, I thought.  I searched the drawers in vain.  Oh, I found one, but it was in use, bundling unsharpened pencils to keep them from infiltrating the writing utensils drawer.  You probably think it’s no big deal to unbundle the pencils and use the rubberband.  That’s because you’ve never sent 3 kids all at once in search of pencils for homework time, only to turn them back time and time again saying every time, “Find a sharpened one. Does this one have a point? No. Find a SHARPENED one.” ...  read more